Get Anxiety Help

I suffer from social anxiety.  Social anxiety Disorder is a recognized psychiatric condition and is common in both sexes and which causes distress and impaired ability to function in social situations in a person’s daily life. This is my personal story but I must say that I manage my anxiety well now, and keep my stress levels down as much as possible.  I won’t say that I am ‘cured’ but I am learning again to enjoy the things I once feared.

Social anxiety affects millions of people yearly and is the third largest mental health problem  in the world. We are often referred to as shy but that is not necessarily so.  I am only shy or nervous in a few situations whereas I can give a talk to groups of people without any problem (public speaking is the most common social fear).  Some people are shy but don’t show it outwardly, actually acting  quite the opposite to hide their nervousness.

What frightens me:
Meeting new people in new places
Dating (although now Im engaged that is no longer a problem I face)
Looking different from everyone else
Embarrassing myself in front of others

I would describe myself as an emotional person and that makes me more likely to be shy or a worrier or to get depressed etc.  I don’t regard this though as a complete negative as I also am kind hearted and a caring person which is the positive side of being that emotional person. Many factors also play a part in whether you develop social anxiety such as the way You were brought up and your family life,  your learned experiences and the way you reacted to them.

I probably developed social anxiety  in my early 20s but cant think of any event that may have triggered it off.  As a child I was confident, outgoing and friendly. It must have been a gradual thing.  I was a young mother at the time and my self esteem was not very good, I worried about everything and I became a negative thinker. I didn’t socialize much as we didn’t have much money and so it was confined to mainly family events and meeting my husbands friends. I cant remember having too many friends of my own at that time.

As a shy person I worried about what others thought of me and I didn’t feel I measured up at social situations like parties and other social gatherings.  It wasn’t helped by having a husband who was a critical and negative person, not just of me, but of most things in general.  I always felt and sometimes made to feel that I was fat and frumpy next to the other wives.  This in turn made me feel that I didn’t want to go or contribute to the conversations at these gatherings.  People just thought I was shy.

As a consequence I started to avoid social situations like the plague.

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A great book I would like to recommend here and now is Overcoming Shyness and Social Phobia: A Step-by-Step Guide (Clinical Application of Evidence-Based Psychotherapy).  It is a guide and a work book by Ronald M Rapee PhD that I have used and found to be very helpful to understanding and managing shyness and social anxiety.

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How do you recognize child anxiety? Are these reactions of my child normal or abnormal?  Its sometimes difficult as we are so close to the person who is suffering the anxiety.

Children are often worried about meeting new people, giving a speech in class, being frightened of the dark or changing schools but these are normal responses and feelings, but when the worry is unrealistic is when there is a real problem.  Often the result is that they will avoid the situation or event.

Child anxiety and fear need to be taken seriously because the child believes that their feel is very real, so listen to them when they approach you.  It carries the same symptoms as adults have but a child doesn’t have the brain capacity or experience to make sense of them.

A very anxious child’s phobia can be made worse by an over protective parent.  Encourage your child to face up to their fears in their own time and to try new things despite the result.  Tell them that mistakes are OK and are just a part of learning from their experiences.

Teaching your child to calm themselves down when they get upset is a very good tactic to help them in situations when you aren’t there to help.  I also found that having a routine for my own children gave them a sense of stability and security, oh and it made my life less stressful too.  This also helps your child from suffering from separation anxiety.

Child anxiety can also carry on into adulthood so dealing with the problems now will mean that this wont carry on through the rest of their life.  If you suspect that your child does suffer from anxiety then please see your family doctor for advice.

A great self help program is available at Panic Away. Check it out and have a look at some of the testemonials. They have a new video on the site as well that describes me to a tee even to the situation of eating out.  Unbelievable!  Even looks like me….I wish.

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color

Guest post courtesy of Corny54, a friend of mine from Squidoo

Surround yourself with

1. bright colors
2. bright light
3. pleasant sounds
4. nice smells

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Spring garden

Corny is a man of few words but he has the right ideas about color.  I love the summer and am happier then, when the sun is bright.  I love Spring because of the smell of the flowers and the sound of the sea makes me start feeling relaxed instantly.  As you can see by my site here,  I love color and try and try and surround myself with it.

The picture at the right was taken at Tulip Time, a spring festival in the Southern Highlands of NSW, Australia.  It was a beautiful day in the garden in spite of the rain, the flowers especially the beautiful tulips brightened up my day.

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These are my personal affirmations that I try to repeat every day.

Affirmations have been used since we have had language.  Personal affirmations are tools that can help you rewrite negative tapes about yourself and your life and are the easiest way to make positive changes and can help you to manage stress.

I hope you enjoy reading mine.

Do you use affirmations?  Please share them here.

If you want to write your own affirmations, but don’t know how to start, then there is technology called Affirm Now that can help.  To check them out Click Here!

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This is a selection from a  poem by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.

For me this poem is all about growing older, getting through the dark days, knowing sunny days are coming and to accept that our life is not perfect.  Being ‘blue’ is ok if you give it a time frame to experience it, then move on.

Overcoming depression

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I love this cartoon because we sometimes have to laugh at the weird and wonderful ’so called’ anxiety therapies available out there.

Reprinted with permission by Chato B. Stewart from http://www.mentalhealthhumor.com

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Fear and Anxiety

Have you been affected by fear and anxiety?  For me it was like a domino effect with stress causing anxiety, then panic appears and finally you fear the panic happening again.  Stress over a long time was the trigger for me.

Fear and anxiety are a normal part of life and have evolved on the basis that you adapt in response to threat.  They are closely linked but quite different and you need to deal with them in different ways.  Anxiety is a vague unpleasant emotional state and it often appears to have no basis or direct threat.  Fear is similar except that it has a specific object.

Fear and anxiety are not bad things in themselves when we are in control of our emotions.  Everyone has experienced these emotions in their lives at some time.

Scarey snakes

Examples of Fears | Anxieties

Anxiety can develop when someone feels overwhelmed, or has difficulty reconciling to some situation or event and when they don’t know how to deal with that situation/event.  The anticipation of a situation that makes you anxious can develop into avoidance of that situation which leads into an anxiety disorder like social anxiety or agoraphobia.

Identifying your fears

Keeping a record of things that make you anxious will help you identify situations you may not have been consciously aware were making you uneasy. Make sure to record your thoughts, feelings and actions and not just the object/thing.

What are your fears?

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Ive never heard of Autogenic Therapy until recently and I’m sure most people haven’t.  Well what is it?

Autogenic Therapy (also called Autogenic Training) is a relaxation technique involving self suggestion which was developed by the German psychiatrist, Johannes Schultz and first published in 1932.  It is a powerful and proven deep relaxation technique similar to mediation, which enables you to relax your body and calm your mind quickly.  Autogenic therapy is one of the simplest and most effective ways to activate the ‘relaxation response’ which can break the vicious cycle of stress related disorders.

The core of this therapy is a course that teaches simple exercises using passive concentration in body awareness and relaxation and is practiced either sitting in a chair, lying down or in a horizontal posture and once mastered it can be done in almost any environment.

Autogenic therapy is used extensively in business and sport to enhance performance and reduce stress and needs to be learned with a qualified therapist.  Once learned, it is a skill for life equipping you to deal with stress completely independently.

Please note that this therapy is very safe but isn’t recommended for people with severe mental problems such as personality disorders, for children or people who lack the intelligence to understand and perform the training.

Please contact your medical practitioner to see if this treatment would benefit you and where it is being held in your local area.

For other stress relief articles see Herbal stress relief or Who else wants instant stress relief.

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anti anxiety soup

This super anti anxiety soup is jam packed full of goodness to boost your immune system, provide antioxidant protection and boost your mood.

The active ingredients to do this are: Onion - a natural antibiotic, Celery which is a traditional soother, Parsnip which releases energy slowly to stop mood swings, Carrots which lower your blood cholesterol, Thyme is a natural antiseptic, Parsley gives antioxidant protection and Black pepper which can increase the absorption of vitamin B.

Carrot and parsnip soup

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Moving on after panic | living a normal life

I really cant say that I am cured from, and that I have succeeded in overcoming panic attacks. If I let my anxiety levels rise then it is a possibility that I may have another panic attack. The difference is now that I don’t fear it. I know how to work through it.

dont panic

Overcoming panic attacks hasnt been a quick fix for me and I dont think too many people can say that it has been for them either. I worked on it, and as I have said in previous posts, I took one step at a time and now I feel I have succeeded.

Looking at life through positive eyes has been something that I have to work at but I am much better at it now than I was in the beginning. It’s like anything that has been a habit, it takes time to change. Life has opened up to me again and I am happy, which is probably a result of that positive outlook.

The hardest thing for me, still, is to not avoid certain places where I used to feel stressed, and I practice that and am doing ok. By exposing myself to the stressors I have, over time, been desensitized to them so I keep that up as I dont want to regress without realizing.

I have come a long way since my first panic attack so many years ago and I am grateful that I have overcome my fears to move forward and live a life that is full and without barriers.

Overcoming panic attacks will be different for each person and I realize that. I hope my story gives other fellow sufferers some hope that life can change for the better with proper treatment and a willingness to get better.

Anxiety doesnt rule my life anymore. I am now in control. Life is good.

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